The Fusion Chef

I call him the "Fusion Chef"... errr... actually he's known to be the Chief Nurse... so might as well call him the "Fusion Chef Nurse". Just the title gives one an idea that he's a man of all sorts. No confusion but he's passionate with his profession yet he loves to cook and he's got a weird taste bud that loves to mix food together and discover what tastes good and not, giving grimace a run for his money.

So why am i blogging about this? We share the same passion for food. And i love to see him eat since it wouldn't be good for me to eat as much as he does...

What's interesting about this dish though, as our main lead for today... is you would never guess what comes with that pork. This piece of protein was seasoned in soy sauce, fish sauce, salt, ketchup, pepper, “magic sarap”(pinoy spice) and ham seasoning. I have never mixed fish sauce and soy sauce in my life. But the Chef Nurse did, which makes this a fusion dish. Mixing spices and seasonings is very critical in the kitchen. You have to know what you’re mixing together to make sure your dish won’t end up in the bin. As far as I can remember, 9 out 10 of the fusions the chef nurse did made sense… made good sense. So I am convinced he’s worthy to be given the title. I never have expected that mixing adobo (a famous Filipino dish) and spicy anssung noodles (Korean dish) would taste like a corn dish and turn out to be good. You’d know a dish would taste good if you hear him say “there’s a woah! Factor”

Seriously… fusion may be critical and the end product would really be a risk. But you would never know how it would taste if you won’t take a bold step to take it. In life… here goes the serious part… fusion is not bad at all. Reflecting on this fusion dish, the fusion chef and my life… this has something to do with contradictions. I love contradictions! It is the mixture of good and bad and the coming together of extreme joy and heart-quenching pain. In our life… things are not all that smooth. Even God didn’t promise a life that is smooth-sailing. Our journey is simply learning to cope and finding how to battle through it all. One would never learn that without the right perspective and connection with the Father.

Our God is not only present in the good and happy times… one simply have to learn to discover the beauty of God’s comfort even in pain. This I have to be reminded of everyday. Even in the dark moments of our soul, we can find good things in it. We can feel His healing embrace and His touch that gives us hope. I’m a sucker for pain, crying and dealing with the hard times in my life. I get the most out of them. Not just being emotional or being over-analytical… simply reflecting and seeing that everything that happens in my life, may it be a product of my own bad decisions or something out of my control, it will contribute in how my character is being shaped. All that happens in my life – pain or joy, failures or victories, are weaved into how the Lord wanted me to fulfill my purpose. The key here is daily re-aligning our heart to Him. That we may gently get in through the fusion of it all.

Fusion happens. It is a part of our life. And getting to know the Fusion Chef Nurse made me realize a lot of things. Even getting this close to the fusion chef is amazing. We may live in different planes but somehow there's a common denominator that fuses us. I didn't even realize he's different from the way I thought he'd be hadn't I taken a leap to know him better. He surprises me each day. He may not know it but his fusion-ness is a reminder for me to enjoy life with the Lord no matter what comes… that there is always hope… that there is every reason to say “hooray for today!” Our journey involves taking risks and then being surprised that the end would give us reasons to jump and be happy. Failures may come but there is always another chance. A chef masters his own signature dish if when his first try gives a bad result… there is another chance to eliminate the seasoning or spice he shouldn’t add. The chef simply learns and cooks all over again.

The fusion chef nurse told me that he was surprised the pork turned out good and the skin tasted well as if you’re not eating any of its fat portion. I am simply thankful that we have a good God. That He continually gives us surprises no matter how bleak our days may seem or how risky our steps may be. God is a God of surprises. The key here is connecting our lives to Him. We have to do that everyday… or else, we will be caught up in the fusion of everything that happens in our journey and we end up in confusion. Armed with God’s hand… I would rather be in the fusion of it all. Happy eating! 

Being Alive

The past year gave me flatlines, ER’s and heart attacks. I was on the edge barely breathing. I almost threw in the towel and retire my running shoes. I never thought I’d make it until the 31^st of December and even step on to a new year. It was the year I almost never stopped crying. When you wake up everyday and you feel a pinch in your heart. Everyday was a feat… it was the year when each day was offered early to God asking him to be the sturdy crutches… for I was losing my grip…

Then He told me to choose between being disabled and facing the truth then giving in for treatment. I became my own patient… my own counselee.

I can’t find any other word to describe the magnanimity in the hardness of it all… Yet it was a year better than the last. It was one of my most meaningful years. It was something I won’t forget. I had too much of everything.

The past year made me think it would be the end yet it was at the end of the year that I felt alive and just simply continually breathing.

After succumbing to solo backpack trips and “tunganga” moments, surrendering to contemplative prayer,  cooking more, unceasing prayer for others and finally sustaining running days & eating healthier… I woke up one day feeling alive. As if I have awoken to a big deep sleep. A big sleep where my inner soul was transported to a different dimension under a dialogue and reconstruction with only one being– the Lord. 

After sifting through my own heart and seeing who I am, accepting my own cross and patiently seeking His voice… my eyes were open. It is as if darkness faded and I suddenly saw the light. Finally, my baggage was taken from me and I felt alive… and all that emotion that was clotting my blood was sucked out.  I know there are still bits and pieces of it left but I now trust the Lord more…

I won’t forget how hard I cried feeling as if I am dead and how hard I cried feeling that I am alive again… By the time fireworks were lighting up the skies that last night of 2011 and first morn of 2012… tears rolled down my cheeks… I whispered… thank You Lord for making me a survivor…

Now all I can do is keep breathing because just at that same time I feel it in my heart… You are watching over me, I simply have to trust you and that you are true to your promises. You became my bestest friend this year Lord… You patiently led my hand for a whole year. I can’t explain but a lot has changed within me.

I don’t need to ask what made me survive it all… You were my vitamins that kept me alive.

“You called and shouted broke through my deafness… now I’m breathing in and breathing out…

I’M ALIVE AGAIN!

You shattered my darkness, washed away my blindness…now I’m breathing in and breathing out…

 I’M ALIVE AGAIN!”

-mattmaher

*photo taken at Iba, Zambales Dec. 31, 2011